Monday, August 3, 2009

august? where did you come from?

time feels like its crawling and yet speeding by at the same time. i can't believe its august already. in the same breath though, i want it go go by faster so i can get back to a semblance of normal.

i've always heard that pregnancy is a wonderful experience for some and a terrible one for others. i am finding myself in the middle of that spectrum. its not terrible now that i'm able to keep my head out of the toilet. but its certainly not what i would call "wonderful". i know many who say they love being preggo, and i can't imagine myself ever saying that.

things seem to be going well as far as marvin is concerned. the big day is coming up soon. aug 17th we go to find out what sex marvin is. then there will be no more marvin, but a little jack or olivia. all along, i've been thinking/feeling that marvin is a chick, but have had my fingers crossed for a boy. i know, i know, either way, so long as its healthy it really doesn't matter. and it doesn't. i just want to know either way so i can plan.

that's the big change in me that i've noticed lately. maybe its due to getting older, or maybe its a desperate attempt to control that which i can not. i've been becoming increasingly dependent on a schedule and planning. i've been finding myself trying to plan things out to the smallest detail. this is causing my brain to go into overdrive at night, and i'm not sleeping well. this lack of sleep is probably my biggest bitch abt being preggo right now. (that and perhaps the amazingly bad acne..wtf hormones...wtf??)

i feel like we have so much to do before marvin comes, and no money to do it. i'm like a woman obsessed with all of this crap, when all i really want to do is relax. again, #1 reason pregnancy is not wonderful for me. on a good note, i think i've felt a few flutters from within that i can't attribute to gas (for once!) and that was very cool. i like the idea of feeling marvin move around. it helps me realize that everything is ok in there.

eh..i don't know if i even have a point today. my thoughts somehow don't make much sense sometimes. (i think the little bugger has sucked out my intelligence along with my energy)

5 comments:

  1. Marvin - the brain sucking parasite from within!!! It is amazing all the emotions and physical changes you have to endure - but the end result will be a good one. 9 months initially seems like a lifetime, but even that time will go fast - then off to college they go. See how I can speed up time??? :)

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  2. so are jack and olivia placeholders or official?

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  3. unless we are struck with some last minute epiphany, jack and olivia are official. he's still pushing for olivia newton (no fucking way) but i'm thinking olivia paige. jack was easier to agree on, jack charles.

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  4. I'm glad for the Jack Charles part, esp the Charles, giving him pappy Horne's first name as a middle is way better then his pappy Steadmans first name for the middle, altho it seems all the males in our family like the idea of Jack Daniel...blah,, none the matter, it will be Olivia Paige I think.

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